Nice (Drunk) Quotes

"You need to shave your pubic regions, seriously..."

"In any case, her main attribute is that she's not psycho..."

"So have you felt an orgasm since you were with me last?"

"Damn dirty Mexicans...and their blackheads..."

"You ever wonder why streets are made out of cement and tires out of rubber and not the other way around? ...Well, I have..."

"GOD! He's just going to tell me to get naked on the webcam..."

"She can't be touched by anybody... because then she'll want to fuck... that's the way she operates."

"I"ll get naked for you if you put a dildo up your ass... and call me mama!"

"Okay... I think Internet Stalker's done talking to me.... NO!!!!"

"oooh... If I could only stand up..."

"Whenever (he) and I get involved in drunken deep thoughts, he gets tired and passes out. So what does that say about his cranial capacity?"
"So why don't you get a spoon and eat my ass?"
"How 'bout I get a fork and knife, since they're more jagged..."
"Ow..."

"Who am I to advise about how you eat another man's asshole? Haha! I win!"